Home Sick
by Mikaa
Summary: FelixMia. Felix believes that he is unable to lead and is haunted by past experiances while the eight warriors travel to save the world.


biHome Sick/i/b  
  
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iChapter I - The Dreams/i  
  
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bGenres/b - Angst/Romance  
  
bSummary/b - iFelix struggles to find a reason to keep going after a series of mis-haps while assisting Mia's troubled mind./i  
  
bPairings/b:  
uMain/u - Felix/Mia uMinor/u - Isaac/Jenna - Ivan/Sheba - Alex/??? (ito be revealed later - t'would be a spoiler.../i)  
  
iThis fic has been rated PG-13 for violence, possible language, sexual inuendo, suggestive themes, and graphic descriptions (for violence)./i  
  
bA/N/b: iThis fic is pseudo-AU, with some differences in character behavior, mostly restricted to Saturos, Karst, et al., and some minor differences in the sequence of events from the game. Some characters may seem out of character; if this offends you, irritates, you, or is intolerable to you, please turn back now.  
  
I do NOT own Nintendo, Camelot, or Golden Sun. This is the only time I will say this for the entire fic, as there is no point in repeating the same blasted phrase each chapter, wasting my time saying something that one chapter alone can handle.  
  
Also, this does contain possible spoilers if you have not beaten the games. Just a fair warning.  
  
You have been warned./i  
  
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Sailing on the blue sea normally had a calming effect to those who sought it's wonderous beauty, it's vast open spaces, it's songs calling to those seeking for an advanture. Indeed, most on board the iKing Hydros Ship (KHS) Aquarius/i were enjoying themselves. The Venus Adept Isaac spent most of his time with the Mars Adept Jenna, telling her of his journey to "save" her and to "stop" her brother. Ivan of Contigo and Sheba of Lalivero spent most of their time with Picard of Lemuria, piloting the massive vessel across the oceans' waves. The Martian Garet spent his time trying to listen to the scholar Kraden and his theories for the Lighthouses. The Mercurian Mia of Imil spent quite a few hours in her own room, resting and recovering from the recent accident.  
  
An accident involving the other occupant of the boat, Felix the Venus Adept.  
  
Laying on his bed, Felix stared at the brown wood that formed the cieling, recalling the "accident." In truth, it was not a life-threatening disaster, or an attack, or an abuse. No, it was something far worse.  
  
Mia had walked in on Felix while he was using the head.  
  
It was an accident that could have been avoided, had Felix shaken the habit that he had formed about not locking the door. Sadly, the habit had stayed with him, and Mia unknowingly opened it, catching him as he disrobbed to bathe. After she ran out, he quickly threw on his pants and caught up with her in a corridor, apoligizing for what happened. Beet red, she forgave him, and ran strait to her room.  
  
Two days later, it seemed that no one other than Mia or Felix were aware of what transpired, which was a fortunate thing for both parties. Elements knew what would happen if anyone eles found out. On second thought, Felix mused, Elements DID know what would happen: Isaac and Garet would tease him to no end, Jenna and Sheba would interrogate Mia to pick on him, and Ivan and Picard would...not really care.  
  
Rolling on to his right side, facing the wall, Felix cursed that damned habit. Habits usually were broken after a set length of time, but when you are forced, year after year, to do one act over and over, it gets burned into you.  
  
It was not Felix's will that he keep the bathroom door unlocked. Or, for that matter, that he never lock any other door that he ever used. After Saturos and Menardi brought him, his parents, and Kyle to Prox, they had begun to train him. Or that was what they told everyone else; to Felix, it was Hell. They had enforced that he never lock any door that would seclude him from others, claiming that they needed to be able to come to his aid should something happen. In reality, they kept him from locking the doors so that they could walkin on him with little or no warning, check on him to see if he was behaving, making sure he was dong what he was told.  
  
One time, he remembered without willing to, Menardi had paid him a visit, telling him that she wished to teach him about pleasure. While she embraced him, Saturos stormmed in, and promplty flung Felix across the room, and stormed over to him. With one hand holding Felix up, the massive Proxian warrior grabbed Felix's groin, twisting it hard. Felix was unable to sit upright for hours, and it was not until years later that he learned of Menardi's true lesson that day - she had set him up so that she could watch him suffer.  
  
Felix shivered at the thought of that day. Unfortunately, it was not the only time such a thing had happened, and it only served to remind him of how pathetic he was. True, he had a mind, he was able to solve the puzzles that the Proxians could not, and he was albe to gather the necessary goods to get to Jupiter Lighthouse. In fact, Felix was almost ready to believe that he was not as worthless as Saturos and Agatio made him think he was.  
  
Then the incident atop Jupiter Lighthouse happened.  
  
Agatio and Karst had attacked Felix the minute he had tossed the Jupiter Star into the tower, sending Picard sprawling with a blow to his head from Karst and Felix to his knees as Agatio belted him in the gut. Karst scarred Felix's back up with her scythe while Agatio held him in place, until a burst of fire knocked Karst back, knocking her into a stone and out of action. Agatio rushed Jenna as she ran towards Felix, but tripped when Sheba created a strong burst of wind under his feet.  
  
Being beated so easily by foes that his sister could beat was bad enough, but being beated by foes that iSheba/i could beat without trouble? She and Ivan were amongst the weakest in their group, and they beat two Proxians that Felix couldn't even scratch! Picard had said something about the tactics of the northern warriors being unfairly cheap and low, but Felix was convinced that the Lemurian was simply trying to make him feel better. To be beaten by foes his own isister/i could beat!  
  
How pathetic he was.  
  
A slight knock on his door broke him out of his train of thought, and he tilted his head to see if anyone was trying to open the door. Not that it was locked... "Yes?"  
  
A soft voice spoke to him, a familiar voice that Felix had once nearly forgotte: Jenna's. "We've found land, Felix. Isaac wants to know if you want to take a team and search for any goods, or if he should go."  
  
Felix sighed softly. Felix had never told anyone of how he felt so worthless, and was quite grateful when he convinced Isaac to take some of the weight of leading the boat full of Adepts to save the world. Yet his sister's boyfriend always wanted to ask Felix if he wanted to lead a team or not. And, naturally, it was always when Felix did not feel like it.  
  
Murphy seemed to be quite fond of thrusting such situations on Felix.  
  
"Yes, I'll go, Jenna. Ask Isaac to ask for volinteers, and I'll be there in about five minutes."  
  
"Ok, Felix."  
  
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Twenty minutes later, Felix wished he had never agreed to go on this trip.  
  
The land they had found had appeared to be a barren island with the usual beach, grassy lands, and a long line of trees on the horizon. Naturally, when Felix decided that they should check the woods for any wild animals, he knew something would go wrong.  
  
And of course, something did - they were lost.  
  
Turning around to face the others, Felix glanced at the faces of the others in the party. Ivan's brow was quite furrowed as he tried to use the powers of Reveal to attempt to find a way out, though Felix doubted that it would get them anywhere. Garet was busy trying to get his massive feet untangled from a mass of vines that he had carelessly walked into. Mia, the third member of the group, was sitting on a massive root a few feet away, slowly staring around the landscape, as if something would pop out and show them the way home. Felix had the impression that her face was trying to convey something else, but whenever he tried to see what it was, it faded as quickly as it appeared.  
  
It didn't help that she was also trying to avoid staring at him, probably with the events of the other day still in her mind. Felix could not blame her.  
  
A sigh came from Ivan as his forehead relaxed. "It's no use; there's no illusion or any sing of where we came from, and I don't think we should try to go back the way we came."  
  
"Why not?" inquired Garet as he tried to rip the vines with his bare hands. "Wouldn't that make the most sense?"  
  
"No, because YOU were the one who was running in circles a second ago chasing the rabbit that stole your biscut, and we had to follow you here."  
  
Grumbling came from the Mars Adept, followed by a thud as he fell over after the vines snapped. "Why don't you just call Sheba, Ivan?" Garet inquired, his face slowly showing a mischievious grin. "Don't tell me you and your girlfriend can't read each other's minds after you two have been so close!"  
  
Felix was about to tell Garet where to put his head when Ivan responded to the taunt. Yet again Felix was reminded that he was unfit to lead, as he was not able to command his own team, much like when Karst was having him participate in mock battles with the Proxian children. Felix sit on a fallen branch about a yard from Mia, his mind lost in the thoughts of the past. The teams were organized where the strongest was the leader for the opposing team, and the team Felix was on was supposed to have the strongest member be the leader. But, iof course/i, Karst didn't want that - she wanted FELIX to be the leader. The other two members of his team regarded him with disgust and refused to follow his orders, instead listening to the second in command. Felix had tried to stop them as they fell into an obvious trap that his opponents had set up, but they had ignored him, and captured. Karst and Saturos had both observed that Felix lacked the skill needed to be a true leader. His other such tests had shown that he was capable of leading, but when it came to others questioning his decisions, he lacked the resolve to fight his foe and keep his troop's faith in him, and faced certain disaster.  
  
Why Saturos, Karst, and Menardi put him through such tests, he did not know. He had guesses, but he learned early on that trying to guess the motives of warriors such as Saturos and Menardi were often not the wisest decisions to where are we going next.  
  
i"to where are we going next?/i  
  
Felix snapped back into reality as he saw Mia, Garet, and Ivan staring at him, their faces one with hope. They were hoping that he had a way out, that he could find a way out of this rotten woods and back to the ship. Their lives were on his head, doomed if he could not find a way to get them out.  
  
But he knew of no way to get out of this pit, no way to know the path to the ship. No way to signal the others that they were in trouble...by having Ivan sending bursts of air like a signal, using an old sailing code known througout Weyard!  
  
"Ivan, could you use your psynergy to create waves of air to pulse to the ship and alert the others to our problem?"  
  
Felix had been exited that he had thought of such a plan, but the smile on his face died as they all looked towards the ground. Trying to find someone to meet his gaze, he was suprised when Mia stared at him.  
  
"Felix," she spoke, soft and soothingly, "Ivan already tried that a second ago, but the trees blocked the pulses."  
  
Felix's heart sunk at this news. It was not so bad that the idea did not work, but the fact that Ivan had already tried it and failed without Felix knowing was quite painful. What was with him, to make him miss such a thing?  
  
Shaking his head, he tried to stand up, uneasy as he rose. Was it him, or was he feeling qutie weak right now? "Let's set up a small camp here. If Isaac thinks something is wrong, the will come looking for us." He tried to sound reassuring, but Garet only groaned, Ivan sighed, and Mia stared at the ground.  
  
iSome leader I am./i  
  
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Felix awoke to find himself flat on his stomach, laying on a hard surface of some kind. Getting on to his hands and feet, he checked himself to check his condition. His clothes were intact, his sword was in its sheath, and his pouch of herbs and snacks was in place. He glanced up to look ahead.  
  
And saw the horror.  
  
It was Vale, or what looked like Vale. Houses showed years of ill-repair, decaying and rotting where they stood. Vines overgrew and filled the whole river, coating anything that was directly above it. A chilly wind blew from out of nowhere, freezing him.  
  
But the biggest horror was the people.  
  
All about there were people, but not nearly enough for the whole village. Most of them were young teens, some kids, and few adults. Felix called to one that resembled Isaac, but all that left his mouth was air.  
  
Confused, Felix moved forward, observing the living conditions. Most people had ratted clothes, most stitched together from scraps of any concievable origin. Men wore chunks of one-time rugs, women wore layers of curtains and sheets. Children used a combination of the two to keep warm.  
  
Looking around, he noticed that the vegetation was a dull grey, the water, or what little there was in a new stream five feet from the old river, was also a dull grey. The houses looked like normal, as did the clothes, people, and... No, the fires were also a shade of grey. What?  
  
Entering one old house, Felix froze as he stared at the two residents. While the others that he saw were vaguely familiar, the two before him were all too familiar: Felix and Mia. The second Felix had free-flowing, ratted hair with long streaks of grey. His clothes were not unlike the other males in the village, and he had...one arm? No, it was probably just Felix's imagination. The Mia next to the duplicate Felix also had long, flowing hair, though it was fully silver than blue. Her clothes were the same as the males, for whatever reason, and she seemed...the same as always, as far as looks.  
  
Stepping further inward, he noticed something differient about them compared to the others outside - he could hear what they were saying:  
  
"Felix, how much longer is it until Gaia Falls gets Kalay?" spoke Mia, her voice still soft and soothing, but now with a trifle hint of dispair.  
  
"It shouldn't be long now."  
  
"Felix, some in the village are proposing that they leap off of Gaia Falls, to end their pains." The duplicate Felix said nothing, and Mia pressed on, "I'm just the healer, Felix. You're the leader now that Isaac has gone on. They want your permission as the leader, you know that."  
  
The second Felix spoke, "Mia, every decision I've made since that one when we got lost has been a disaster, you know that. If I give them permission, you KNOW something ill will befall us!"  
  
"Felix, the world is going to end soon. I know you blame what has happened on that day, but you have to realize - you have to act because of what happened. You can't stand by and let people slip even further into dispair as they wait for the end. You have to allow those that wish to go to..."  
  
Unwilling to hear more of this, Felix ran out of the house, his hands grasping his head, his mind abuzz. His choice was the one that fated them to this? His choice? HIS CHOICE?? As he ran, he clenched his eyes shut, ignoring the pounding of the wind in his face. HE was the one that destroyed the world? NO! It was not possible! How could he, of all people do this? Simple, he realized as he ran. He was not a leader, never was, and would never be one, and his lack of skill did this. It did THIS!  
  
Felix never saw realized he was falling down towards Gaia Falls until it was too late...  
  
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Read and Review, and I'll try to churn out a second chapter soon...  
  
MIKAA 


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